


I need someone on days like this I do

by storiesthatmakeus



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Best Friends, Heartbreak, Love, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-01
Updated: 2018-01-01
Packaged: 2019-02-26 05:05:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,147
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13228659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/storiesthatmakeus/pseuds/storiesthatmakeus
Summary: Aaron and Robert are best friends now, and best friends tell each other they love each other, right?Or...three times Aaron asks Robert to tell him he loves him, and one time he tells Robert.





	I need someone on days like this I do

**Author's Note:**

> I have absolutely no idea what this waffle is, but it's what happens when you wake up at the crack of dawn on New Year's Day because a car alarm is preventing you from getting any sleep :(
> 
> Anyhoo, hope someone likes this mess of angsty love and that you all had a wonderful New Year's Eve however you chose to see in the end of 2017. 
> 
> And if you're sad...just think...Robron wedding 2.0 is this year :)

Robert was perched on the arm of his little sister’s couch when he heard it; the soft knock on the front door of Keepers that he had been waiting for. Ever since his phone had vibrated with a message from Aaron asking if he was awake, he had been anticipating his arrival, knowing his ex-husband would be at his door in minutes once he got the answer he wanted.

Pulling open the front door quietly, his heart broke when he saw the exhausted, tear-stained face of the man opposite him. He didn’t say anything; he didn’t need to, the small nod of his head as he stepped aside enough to tempt Aaron into the warmth of the little cottage.

They stood in silence for what seemed like an eternity, just looking at each other, until eventually Aaron spoke.

‘’Vic?’’

‘’With Moira.’’ Robert replied softly. ‘’It’s over?’’

‘’It’s over.’’ Aaron confirmed, his glassy eyes the final straw for Robert, who closed the distance between them and enveloped Aaron in a hug, the cold from the early January air still evident on his body.

‘’Did we…did we do the right thing?’’ Aaron asked, muffled against Robert’s t-shirt.

‘’You did what you had to, to protect your best friend.’’

‘’But what if there was another way?’’

‘’He couldn’t face prison again Aaron, and there was no way he was taking his mum away from Isaac.’’ Robert explained softly, and he felt Aaron nod against his neck.

‘’But what if I never see him again?’’ Aaron asked as he pulled away from Robert, searching his eyes for an answer that he simply couldn’t give him.

‘’I don’t know if you ever will.’’ He replied honestly. ‘’What can I do Aaron, to make this better?’’

‘’Just tell me…’’

‘’What?’’

‘’What I need to hear.’’

He knew he shouldn’t, knew that saying it would pull at the delicate stitching on both of their freshly healed wounds, but maybe in its own way, saying it would heal, however temporarily, the new scars beginning to form on the heart of the man opposite him. So he said it.

 

‘’I love you Aaron.’’

 

 

‘’How is she?’’

Robert picked his way through the explosion of clothes and tat that littered Liv’s bedroom floor as he stood next to Aaron, holding out a steaming mug of tea that the other man accepted with a small smile, his gaze still fixed on his sleeping sister.

‘’She’ll live.’’

‘’So, not gonna kill her then, for making you worry?’’

‘’Oh no, I’m still gonna kill her.’’ Aaron joked weakly. ‘’But after that, she’ll live.’’

A silence descended between the two of them as they drank their tea slowly, the steady hum of Liv’s breathing the only sound in the room.

‘’I’m sorry.’’ Aaron eventually murmured.

‘’For what?’’

‘’I never even thanked you for finding her, bringing her home.’’

‘’You don’t need to thank me for that Aaron, ever.’’

‘’But she’s not your problem anymore.’’

‘’She’ll always be my problem, whether she wants to be or not.’’ Robert smiled sadly.

Another silence fell following Robert’s admission, and he knew what Aaron was thinking, the anxieties etched across his face.

‘’Talk to me Aaron.’’

‘’I’m failing her Robert, and I promised her I’d look after her.’’

‘’You’re not failing her Aaron. She’s a sixteen year old girl, getting drunk at random house parties is normal.’’

‘’Yea? And ending up on the wrong side of Hotten with a car full of total strangers five years older than her is normal is it?’’

‘’We’ve all done stupid things as teenagers Aaron.’’ Robert countered softly. ‘’She’s rebelling, it’s what they do, push back against the rules.’’

‘’Against me.’’ Aaron said suddenly, taking Robert by surprise.

‘’What?’’

‘’She’s taken on so much, since Adam…helping with the books, the bills and I just let her…I’m the adult, she shouldn’t be sorting my life out.’’

‘’You’re her big brother, she just wants to help you.’’

‘’I put too much on her shoulders.’’

‘’Then put it on mine instead.’’ Aaron glanced at Robert curiously, confused by his offer. ‘’Give me the books and the bills, I’ll sort it all, and you two can spend some time together, just brother and sister.’’

‘’Why would you do that?’’

‘’You’re my mate, and it’s partly my business too.’’ Robert explained simply. ‘’Look, it’s late so I’ll let you get some rest, don’t stay in here all night yea? Sleep.’’

Aaron smiled in appreciation as Robert pressed a comforting hand to his shoulder before leaving. Just as he was at the door, Robert heard his voice again.

‘’She doesn’t hate me does she?’’

‘’Not possible.’’ Robert replied looking back at Aaron. ‘’She loves you.’’

‘’You think I can do this? Look after her?’’ Robert nodded reassuringly. ‘’How are you so sure?’’

He saw the look in Aaron’s eyes, what he needed to hear, the small grain of confidence he got from hearing those words, and he couldn’t deny it to him.

 

‘’Because I love you.’’

 

 

‘’What are you doing hiding out here?’’

‘’Hardly hiding am I? We’re out in the open.’’ Aaron scoffed lightly in response to Robert’s question as he stood next to him on the bridge. ‘’Why are you here?’’

‘’Overheard your mum in the pub, said you’d done a disappearing act so I came to find you.’’

‘’You didn’t have to.’’ Aaron said softly, but his smile told Robert he was grateful for the company.

‘’So…you gonna tell me why you’re not hiding then?’’

‘’You don’t want to know.’’

‘’Then I wouldn’t have asked. Whatever it is, you know you can’t shock me.’’

Robert smiled encouragingly at Aaron, hoping the look in his eyes was enough to convince him to unload, and he saw the moment the man opposite him relented.

‘’Alex…’’

‘’Yea…?’’

‘’He said he loves me.’’

‘’And you didn’t say it back?’’ Aaron shook his head in confirmation. ‘’Well you haven’t been together that long, not properly, you might not feel it now but…’’

‘’That’s the thing though Robert, I didn’t just not feel _it_ , I didn’t feel anything.’’

‘’I’m not following.’’

‘’When Jackson said it, I felt…terrified.’’ Aaron began nervously. ‘’But it was in a good way, like it was the start of something real. With Ed…after everything that happened, him saying it made me feel safe…but Alex said it, and…’’

‘’It didn’t mean anything.’’ Robert finished.

‘’Am I a horrible person? Have I led him on?’’

‘’No Aaron, of course not. You don’t have to fall in love with every person you date, that’s not how it works. If it did, things would be a lot more complicated.’’

‘’Or simple.’’ Aaron countered.

‘’Maybe...’’ Robert agreed with a small smile, which disappeared when he saw the look in Aaron’s eyes. ‘’What is it?’’

‘’What if I never feel it with him, or anyone? I feel like I’ve closed off somehow lately, and I don’t know what to do…’’

‘’You will Aaron, you’ve been through a lot lately with Liv…and Adam…but you’re the most feeling person I know, and you’ve felt so much these past few weeks, so maybe you’re just processing that, and there’s no room for anything else. Don’t put pressure on yourself okay? Go home, get some rest, things might look different tomorrow.’’

Robert waited for Aaron to nod in agreement before turning to leave.

‘’Wait.’’ He suddenly heard behind him, and he turned back to see Aaron with a curious look on his face. ‘’Don’t you want to know how I felt when you said it?’’

‘’I do know.’’

‘’Can you say it again? I just want to make sure I still feel something.’’

‘’Aaron…’’

‘’Please?’’

‘’You don’t need to hear me say it.’’

Robert walked away, trying to ignore the feeling of disappointed eyes watching him leave. He was barely through the door of Keepers when he had his phone out, the quick message sent before he had time to register his decision.

 

_I love you Aaron._

 

He wanted to just turn his phone off immediately, as if that would take it back, but the reply came through before he could. Just as short as his, but said just as much.

 

_I felt that._

 

 

 

Aaron didn’t care that he was soaked through, the drops of rain falling from his hair and dripping down his neck onto his collarbone. Didn’t care that every bit of his clothing was stuck to him and the cold April breeze was causing goose bumps to prickle all over his skin, and that he’d likely be struck down with a cold for the rest of the week. The only thing he cared about was the man standing in front of him, looking at him in complete bafflement as they both hovered nervously in the porch of the hut, the cricket pavilion where they’d shared a picnic a year previously stretching behind them.

‘’Please don’t hate me Robert.’’

‘’Why would you think that?’’

It had taken him so long to register it, why Robert had not been seen all day. He had put it down to haulage meetings, until Vic let slip how low he’d seemed the previous night, and when he’d nearly collided with Marlon, who was too busy muttering about making a picnic basket for his mum and Paddy to notice Aaron in front of him, the penny finally dropped.

So here he was, ignoring the cold seeping through his clothes, looking at his ex-husband, or best friend, or love of his life. Whatever Robert was, the label didn’t matter, but explaining himself did.

‘’Because I’ve been such a selfish prick these last few months.’’

‘’You’re the least selfish person I know Aaron.’’

‘’Then you don’t know me.’’

‘’I don’t understand…’’

‘’We both know what day it is.’’ Aaron interjected suddenly, and he saw the moment of recognition on the other man’s face, before it disappeared again.

‘’It’s just any other day.’’

‘’No Robert, it’s a year to the day that we found out Rebecca was pregnant.’’

‘’You remembered?’’

‘’Took me a while, but I got there.’’

‘’So why are you here Aaron?’’

‘’We’re best friends yea?’’ Robert nodded slowly in agreement, still baffled. ‘’Okay, so best friends support each other right?’’

‘’Yea…’’

‘’Like you did for me with Adam and my sister and Alex, right?’’

‘’Yea but…Aaron what does this have to do with you being selfish?’’

‘’Because you did all these things for me…supported me…told me you loved me when I asked you to…and I didn’t do the same for you.’’

‘’Yes you did Aaron, you were there for me all the time, I knew I had you…’’ Robert argued.

‘’But I should have told you…’’

‘’Told me what?’’

‘’Robert, you had to watch Chrissie…’’ Aaron choked on the word, but Robert knew, the image of her body fizzing in front of him.

‘’Don’t…’’ Robert started, and Aaron could see the tears welling in his eyes.

‘’You had a little boy taken away from you, after his mother spent months lying to you.’’

‘’Aaron…’’

‘’I watched you cry, and grieve and I didn’t say it then, but I’m saying it now.’’

‘’What?’’

‘’That I love you.’’

‘’I know you love me Aaron. And you didn’t have to say it, because I knew, and I’m okay now. I’ve gotten through it, all of it.’’

‘’But you should have had me by your side, holding your hand, telling you I loved you.’’

‘’Did you not hear me Aaron? I’m okay.’’ Robert protested.

‘’No Robert, you’re not hearing me. I’m not saying I love you as one best friend to another, well I am but…’’

‘’Aaron, you’re not making any sense.’’

‘’I couldn’t give my heart to Alex, not when it wasn’t mine to give away.’’

‘’I don’t…’’

‘’It’s yours Robert. My heart is yours.’’

‘’Mine?’’ Robert asked, his eyes widening as he looked for doubt in Aaron’s, but there was none.

‘’I love you Robert, I’m in love with you.’’

‘’You are?’’

Aaron took a step forward, cautiously closing the space between them.

‘’We should have faced these last few months together, but we can face the rest of our lives together, if you’ll have me.’’ He said, suddenly very aware of himself, but he felt a tiny trickle of heat pass through him, and he looked down to see Robert had clasped their hands together.

‘’Are we still best friends?’’ Robert asked shyly. ‘’Because I only want to do this if we’re still best friends.’’

‘’Is my best friend in love with me too?’’

‘’Yes.’’ Robert breathed out shakily.

‘’Then we can do this.’’

Aaron didn’t care that his clothes were sodden, or that he could barely feel his toes from the cold, because he had his best friend in his arms, pressing soft kisses to his lips and sharing his warmth with him like he shared his heart, and that was all he needed.

 

 


End file.
